Sunday, November 15, 2009

submitting and loving it

often times when i study the bible, i become convinced of some truth in my head, based upon the text. its often only later that i really come to experience and know and appreciate these truths. its often when i experience the truth that i can rejoice in it.

this has been true of my theology of predestination, prayer, gender roles in marriage and grace, among other things.

"wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord." ephesians 5:22

though this is a very controversial verse, i don't remember a time that i ever really disagreed with this verse intellectually. i do, however, remember a time when i resisted it in my heart.

this has changed, in part because of the benefit of jesus-centered, biblical preaching on the subject, as well as the work of the holy spirit in my life. it has also helped me to see that practically, this really is the best way for a marriage to function.

so now, instead of pushing back against alex, and i can joyfully submit, which frees me up to fulfill my role and the lover and nurturer of our family.

these are some of the ways that i benefit from our different roles in marriage:

*i never have to carry the burden of being the ultimate decision maker for us (this especially helps because i am so indecisive!). for example, right now we are on the verge of choosing a church. if it was up to me to decide, i would be a little stressed, but since its ultimately up to alex to decide in my mind, it makes it much easier.

*my natural tendency is to worry about how i/we spend money, but since i have really embraced my role to submit, i dont have to nit-pick about spending money. i can trust that Alex will make honoring decisions before God in this area

*also in the area of money, i am freed up to focus on our household and [starting] our family, and not worry about where the money for this is going to come from.

*i wont have to be the one that stands before jesus and gives an account for how i lead our family.

*i am able to focus my energy into loving and serving alex, and supporting everything that he leads out in, managing our household and being hospitable.

*submission is humbling. i need to be humbled. it helps me to focus less on myself, which is also beneficial for our relationship.




[disclaimer: i am most definitely not perfect in my desire to submit. i merely write this to rejoice in how far God has brought me so far!]

2 comments:

  1. I found a link to your blog on Passionate Homemaking, and thought I would start at the beginning and give it a read!

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  2. Thank you for your blog. I recently found my wife was getting too many ideas about "independence" and "feminism". This will help me to justify that her godly role is to serve me.

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