praying for big things

do you pray for big things?  things that are very close to your heart?

and how do you handle it when God doesn't answer these prayers?

i read something from jerry bridges recently answering this last question.  it has reverberated through my head since i read it, and i wanted to share it with you:

"an attitude of acceptance says that we trust God, that He loves us, and knows what is best for us.  acceptance does not mean that we do not pray [for example] for physical healing, or for the conception and birth of a little one to our marriage. we should indeed pray for those things, but we should pray in a trusting way.  we should realize that, though God can do all things, for infinitely wise and loving reasons, He may not do that which we pray that He will do.  how do we know how long to pray?  as long as we can pray trustingly, with an attitude of acceptance of His will, we should pray as long as the desire remains"

interestingly enough, among a few of the big things i have been praying for recently include two that he listed above.  i have been praying for God to heal esther from her hypothyroidism and that our next two kiddos will be adoptable as soon as they enter into our home.

these things are very close to my heart.  i want so much for God to answer these prayers that i can't even describe it.  and, by his grace, i don't think that these prayers are too big for him, and i know he can easily answer them if and when he wants.  he has shown me time and again that he indeed can do immeasurably more than i could ask or imagine, and he also delights to give us what we desire, in the same way that i delight to give our girls the things that they desire.

but at the same time, by God's grace, i have immense trust in him for both of these things.  i know that God will work it for good even if he doesn't heal esther, and i can already imagine many good reasons why he wouldn't choose to heal her.  but i continue to pray that he will.  i also know that God can work it for good if we don't get to adopt our next two kiddos.  God has done much good in our lives and family through all five of the foster kiddos we have had in our home, none of whom have been adoptable.  but i continue to pray with all of my heart that he would choose that our next two would be adoptable.