on preparing (again) for becoming a new mom

our due date is less than two months away.  people keep asking if i am nervous, but all i can think is how hard can one be compared to four?  but i am trying not to be too confident, since we are inexperienced with newborns (lovely girl was 5 months when we got her).

i am looking forward to the next couple months for doing some of the research and preparation that i have been wanting to do for a while.  i am almost done with the two natural childbirth books that i bought (ina may's guide to childbirth and the bradley method).  next on my list is the womanly art of breastfeeding.  and after that i want to read several books from different perspectives about vaccines... i see that as a major decision and i want to make sure that i do plenty of research in order to make an informed decision.  basically, i need to learn about everything that i didn't need to learn about for being a foster mom. :)

i also need to research and buy a set of newborn cloth diapers, so i would love any input from people with experience in that!  i already have a set for 16+lbs that i love... so i just need the little ones.

i am excited for the blessing of this free time to prepare well for our baby.

as a side note, please pray for our little bun.  my midwife is concerned because she is not gaining weight like she should, which could lead to complications.  right now i am going in for extra testing twice a week to monitor how she is doing.

one year ago today...

...the waiting ended.  we went to a meeting.  and then the call came... there was a little boy, and a a baby girl that had just been taken by child services.  they needed a home.

one year ago today...

...our world was rocked.  our lives were changed.

...i went from lots of free time to almost no free time. [and i dont miss any of it]

...i thought i was becoming a "real" mom.

...i texted our community group to tell them we would not be attending.  they showed up on our doorstep with target bags full of blessings [ie diapers and other necessities!]

...i woke up in the middle of the night to feed a baby for the first time ever [but prayerfully not the last time]

...i embarked on a remarkable journey that grew my relationship with God, and with alex.

...my heart overflowed with joy and love like i didn't know it could.